Friday, 20 June 2008

A new chapter

Back during grade 5, we were given a book called "Reading Journey" where we had to read a hundred books over the course of the year. After every book, we had to fill a few things about it like the name of the author, number of pages and a few thoughts of ours. I remember writing about one such book, I've forgotten its name but this is what I wrote about its ending:

"I did not like the ending of this story because it was so sad."

In truth it wasn't supposed to be a sad ending. It was bittersweet, where some close family members of the protagonist died while trying to protect her. But that was the first time I ever experienced that feeling, and I told myself that I'd never let myself feel that again. I was only ten back then, and like most 10 year olds, I was under the impression that the world was split into black and white. You know, the good and bad. I grew up like many other kids watching cartoons and reading books which always seemed to end with the "And they lived happily ever after" theme. But as the years passed I opened my eyes to the wider world and realised that there are so many grey areas. Nothing is perfect and you're never completely happy; understandable since life is only a test.

Anyway, my A'levels finished yesterday and for the first time in my life, I was able to blow a huge sigh of relief. I've been going to school for as long as I remember, and three consecutive months of exams have taken its toll on all of us. After the exam, my friends and I stood outside Dharubaaruge trying to decide what to do to get over the exam fatigue (and keeping our eyes peeled in case any colour bomb came our way). I said goodbye to some of them, whom I won't be seeing for quite some time. I had walked halfway home when it hit me. I may never be able to meet some of them again! I won't have to trudge to school early in the morning every weekday. I won't be wearing the uniform again! I won't be able to spend time with my friends the same way I did at school. Darn bittersweetness! For the first time, I find myself in unchartered territories. School was all about shaping us for this. To teach us how to navigate our way to being successful and respected people within our society.

I know that more than eight hundred others feel the same way, even though we all claim to be having the time of our lives. We're going to miss the school life terribly, but only now does the real thing begin. Here we come!

6 comments:

.mini said...

hmm..

Control Freak said...

i know what ur thinkin :D

bulhaa said...

its so weird. for the past ten years there had always been a plan of what to do. but suddenly the world is full of possibilities and uncertainties. its damn scary i tell you O.O

Raniya said...

Yeah, it was a confusing moment for me too.

Life really begins at this point, right now eh? And the choices we make now we'll have to live with.

Scary.

Yaamyn said...

as someone who'ze been there done that.. i can tell u DON"T WORRY

you gonna have much more fun where you go next

Control Freak said...

not worryin mate..
i guess im still in a transitional stage